{"id":7331,"date":"2017-06-22T13:53:34","date_gmt":"2017-06-22T13:53:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.kirkhalliday.com\/site\/?page_id=7331"},"modified":"2017-06-22T13:56:10","modified_gmt":"2017-06-22T13:56:10","slug":"internet-bumper-stickers-volume-2","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"http:\/\/www.kirkhalliday.com\/kh\/home-3\/quote-corner\/internet-bumper-stickers\/internet-bumper-stickers-volume-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Internet Bumper Stickers Volume 2"},"content":{"rendered":"
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\"What were you in civilian life?\" \"Happy, sir!\"<\/p>\n

I'm not a photographer. I just wear all this to lose weight.<\/p>\n

I'm going insane and I'm taking you with me.<\/p>\n

Team effort: a lot of people doing what _I_ say!<\/p>\n

And Adam asked, \"What's a headache?\"<\/p>\n

7.2 on the sphincter scale.<\/p>\n

Dachshunds are really small crocodiles with fur.<\/p>\n

Found God? If nobody claims Him in 30 days, he's yours!<\/p>\n

Perform random acts of violence and senseless slaughter.<\/p>\n

Okay, THAT'S IT! Arm the electric bagpipes.<\/p>\n

I came to see you off, and you certainly are!<\/p>\n

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.<\/p>\n

Clinical studies show there are no answers.<\/p>\n

My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.<\/p>\n

Vertebrates...unquestionably gave rise to chiropractors.<\/p>\n

There is a fine line between creative genius and insanity.<\/p>\n

God always has another custard pie up his sleeve.<\/p>\n

The thing most generally raised on land is taxes.<\/p>\n

If the world is my oyster, where is my oyster knife?<\/p>\n

If I were two faced, would I wear this one?<\/p>\n

Seen on baby's bib: SPIT HAPPENS.<\/p>\n

Windows ice cream...Hoggin' DOS.<\/p>\n

Isometric: sign in the window of a modern tailor.<\/p>\n

Health is the slowest possible rate at which one can die.<\/p>\n

Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.<\/p>\n

I'm starting a war for peace!<\/p>\n

A husband is a lover who pushed his luck too far.<\/p>\n

If it ain't broken, play with it until it is.<\/p>\n

A squirrel is just a rat with good P.R.<\/p>\n

Always be sincere, even if you don't mean it.<\/p>\n

I'm not old, I'm chronologically gifted.<\/p>\n

Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for.<\/p>\n

Try a new lease on life, and the landlord raises the rent.<\/p>\n

Give me a tuna on rye, hold the mercury.<\/p>\n

No...why, have YOU ever snorted laser toner?<\/p>\n

Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional!<\/p>\n

Amish bumper sticker: Caution! Do not step in exhaust.<\/p>\n

Get your mind out of the gutter! Grab mine while you're there, please.<\/p>\n

Exactly what time of morning did technology pass me by?<\/p>\n

Elvis is dead and I don't feel so good myself.<\/p>\n

When subtlety fails us we must resort to cream pies.<\/p>\n

I've got morals. I just don't know where they are.<\/p>\n

Watch the short jokes or I'll bite you on the ankle!<\/p>\n

As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.<\/p>\n

You are in a twisty maze of little install diskettes.<\/p>\n

Who do you call to exorcise software?<\/p>\n

Glob thinkally, loc actally|InterNet Bumper Stickers<\/p>\n

The time to make up your mind about people is...never.<\/p>\n

If you want to know about paranoids, follow them around.<\/p>\n

The world of children's publishing is bunny eat bunny.<\/p>\n

Only the insane take themselves quite seriously.<\/p>\n

For a bug-free environment do NOT run this program!<\/p>\n

I think sex is better than logic, but I can't prove it.<\/p>\n

Deja moo: knowing you've herd all this bull before.<\/p>\n

Real programmers use \"copy con program.exe\"<\/p>\n

A language is a dialect with an army and navy.<\/p>\n

I am Drunk of Borg. Resistance is floor tile.<\/p>\n

Think you're confused? Wait until I explain it.<\/p>\n

Confession is good for the soul, but bad for the career.<\/p>\n

Freedom is doing what you like, happiness is liking what you do.<\/p>\n

A naked man fears no pickpocket.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>

\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<< Previous Volume\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div>
\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\tNext Volume >>\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“What were you in civilian life?” “Happy, sir!”I’m not a photographer. I just wear all this to lose weight.I’m going insane and I’m taking you with me.Team effort: a lot of people doing what _I_ say!And Adam asked, “What’s a headache?”7.2 on the sphincter scale.Dachshunds are really small crocodiles with fur.Found God? If nobody claims Him […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":6627,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-7331","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kirkhalliday.com\/kh\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/7331","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kirkhalliday.com\/kh\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kirkhalliday.com\/kh\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.kirkhalliday.com\/kh\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.kirkhalliday.com\/kh\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7331"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/www.kirkhalliday.com\/kh\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/7331\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7338,"href":"http:\/\/www.kirkhalliday.com\/kh\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/7331\/revisions\/7338"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.kirkhalliday.com\/kh\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/6627"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.kirkhalliday.com\/kh\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7331"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}